Ugh.
It was all too delicious.
I brought my Quorn turkey loaf, and it was made fun of. But even the ones making the jokes had to admit that it tasted pretty darn good, and the texture was even close to real turkey.
I liked it, and if you put a little gravy on it, you would not even know that it was not the 'once' live bird.
See, that's where I have the problem. The 'once' live part. I am so comfortable with not eating meat anymore, it surprises even me.
I also made a Pear and Red Onion Gratin, recipe HERE that totally boggled everyone. It is definitely different, I loved it, and my mother maintains that a foreigner must have come up with it.
Anyway, the headache remained low key throughout the day, which I was grateful for. But as soon as I went to sleep last night, the headache increased enough to wake me up. THAT is disturbing.
So when the doctor's office called this morning, to tell me that my MRI was scheduled for Tuesday at 8am, I was both happy, and distressed. Tuesday? Really?
So I took L's advice.........the squeaky wheel gets the grease......and I called the imaging center, and told them the simple truth. "I have had a headache for 5 weeks now."
How about today at 1pm?? Can you do that???
Uh, yeah. With bells on. I'll be there.
As soon as they rolled me into the MRI machine, and I saw how close it was to my face, I slammed my eyes shut. Seriously. And I promised myself that no matter what, I would NOT open them while I was in there. I imagined they were GLUED shut. I don't think you have to be claustrophobic to NOT LIKE THAT. And I couldn't take the chance of screwing this test up, so I made the hugest effort I could to take myself somewhere else.....anywhere else. The noise was deafening. Thuds, and horns, and bumps. Crazy.
If you didn't have a headache, not to worry, you would have one when you got out.
But the test was completed, and I was rolled out into the open. Then, and only then, I opened my eyes, and for some reason, the tears rolled down my face.
What a wimp, eh?
Well, it is what it is today. For sure. I will admit to being beat down a bit by this pain.
I managed a walk for Roy, and for me.
It was not as cold as it looked.
And I find, that my headache loses its power over me, if I keep moving. The truth is, it's hard to get going, but I know that if I do, I can push the headache back a notch. Other things take center stage.
Roy. Fresh air. Walking. Being alive. Being grateful.
Then Roy took his nap in the sun.
At times, I can't believe this is happening. A headache for 5 weeks? It seems impossible to me, and yet I know that it is true. It is real. There has to be a reason, right?
What really scares me, is when I mentally make that list of what might be causing this monster to have taken up residence right behind my eyes.
And then I think, what if they don't find the reason?? And the headaches just go on, and on?
Right now, I am choosing not to think about it. I can't.
Maybe I'll think about it tomorrow.
After all, says Scarlett, tomorrow is another day.
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