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Poster? (I Hardly Even Knew Her!)

Ooohs and ahhs, y'all: the official Oscar posters have been unveiled.

And, yes, in the male one it certainly does look like Oscar is standing in for a big, golden phallus. Not like he hasn't always been viewed as such. I'm choosing to view that poster as an avant garde statement against the dearth of Best Actress contenders this year. Of course, it would have made for better symmetry if the female poster were holding a pair of Golden Globes. I'm saying!

Anyway, crudeness aside, here's what I'm wondering: The posters are supposedly culled from "vintage photos of Oscar winners from the past." So why hasn't the Internet already sussed out which headless torsos are being featured? Don't tell me everyone has had something better to do today. There has to be some Oscar obsessive out there who knows those poses by heart. Hop to it, fanatics!

[pseudo-editor's note: I feel kind of like a deadbeat dad this week, blogging with my secret family across town while my own blog goes negelected and hungry. I'm a polyblogamist, and I don't think I'm too proud of it. Anyhoo, I hope to entertain you while Nathaniel's gone.]

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